Coaching for high achievers stuck in people-pleasing and burnout Aberdeenshire and Online
You did everything right.
So why doesn’t it feel like enough?
You did everything right. So why doesn’t it feel like enough?
For the reliable ones who deliver for everyone else and come last on their own list.
Success should feel better than this
A 30-minute conversation to find what’s really driving it. No pitch.
"It felt quite incredible. I feel I've finally released some 30-year-old guilt I'd been carrying, and I physically feel more well/better for it. I'm so grateful Jo!"
Why reaching the goal changed nothing
On paper you are doing well.
When I recently asked people like you what they were really struggling with, I didn't hear ambition.
I heard "I know I am overworking" and "too exhausted to do anything after a day's work."
Here is what I have come to believe, after years of this work and after living it myself: this was never a time-management problem, and no planner or list of tricks was going to fix it.
Underneath the overworking there is usually a pattern, driving all that achieving without ever resolving the feeling underneath.
That is why reaching the goal changed nothing. The goal was never where the problem lived.
That is the work I do.
Not managing the symptoms on the surface, but understanding the pattern at the root, so the life you have built finally starts to feel like yours.
The champagne I saved for later
In 2008, I finished my management diploma, and one of the GPs gave me a bottle of champagne to celebrate.
I saved it for when it felt worth celebrating.
It sat on my wine rack for 13 years. When I finally opened it in 2021, it was flat.
By then, I knew exactly how that bottle felt. I’d started as a receptionist in a GP surgery and worked my way up to practice manager. I spent my Sunday evenings planning how to hit the targets and prove I deserved the promotion. I was the capable one, the person everyone leaned on. Then I’d hit the target, wait for a spark in my belly, and think, “Is this it?”
I thought the next goal would fix it. Then I thought leaving would fix it. It took me until 2020, already trained as a coach, to work with a coach myself and start seeing what had been running underneath all along: I’d spent my life trying to prove I was good enough.
I went the long way round so you don’t have to.
That’s why I do this work, and why I trained in coaching, TARC EFT and clinical hypnotherapy. I wanted to understand what actually helps someone stop chasing the next thing to feel okay.
Qualifications
Wellbeing Coaching, Raw Horizons, 2019 (Association for Coaching accredited)
TARC EFT Practitioner, Live4energy College, 2021
Clinical Hypnotherapy Diploma, NCCH, 2024
24 years NHS experience, receptionist to practice manager
How I work
TARC EFT, for releasing the emotional charge behind people-pleasing, guilt and over-giving.
Clinical hypnotherapy, for working at the level of the pattern and restoring a steadier sense of self.
Practical coaching, for the day-to-day tools that help change stick.
Success should feel better than this.
Why "just set a boundary" doesn't work
Work’s finished. You’re sat down, or you’re trying to be, but your mind hasn’t got the memo. It’s still running the conversation from earlier and bracing for tomorrow, even though there’s nothing left to do.
Most advice says the fix is a boundary. Say no more, switch off properly, leave work at work. I understand why, because the boundary is the visible bit, the thing that’s supposed to make the noise stop. But if you can’t hold a boundary, it isn’t because you lack the skills. It’s the last step in a longer chain, and if you only work on the last step, the chain pulls tighter somewhere else.
Here’s what I’ve seen. Something small happens, and before you’ve had a chance to think, you’re already reacting to something much older than the moment in front of you. A voice says, “I can’t let this go wrong” or “I can’t let them down.” So out comes the yes you didn’t mean, the over-explaining, the conversation you’re still replaying at bedtime.
Relaxation tricks and breathing techniques can be useful, but they mostly help with what happens afterwards. I work further back, with the pattern producing it.
You’ll still get practical tools, but a tool only holds once the thing setting it off has started to loosen.
Sandy was a lead practice nurse in a busy GP surgery. She couldn’t finish work on time, and when she got home, her head was still at work.
Five years on: “I have learnt who I am and who I want to become. I am still a work in progress.”
Free People-Pleasing Pattern Check
A quick quiz to spot the habits leaving you drained, guilty, and stuck
Takes less than 2 minutes · Free and instant results
Why it still doesn’t feel like enough
You can’t switch off, you can’t hand things over, and the next goal never quite does what you hoped. I work with the pattern underneath all of that, so the life you’ve built starts to feel like yours.
Burnout and the mind that won’t switch off
You finish work, but your head doesn’t. We look at what keeps you running when there’s nothing left to do, not just how to get through another week of it.
People-pleasing and the yes you didn’t mean
You say yes, over-explain, then replay the conversation for hours. We look at what’s driving that yes, so saying no doesn’t have to cost you the whole evening.
Ready for a different way forward?
You had a buzz once. Let's get it back.
If you’ve hit the goal and you’re still waiting to feel something, start here.
"Hi, I'm Jo, watch this if you're not sure this is for you."
Someone who felt exactly like you do right now.
"Working with Jo has been like a weeping hole being gently sewn up. She's helped me let go of the negative thoughts I was holding on to, ground my energy so I can think clearer, and not feel bad for putting boundaries in place. I'm more confident and calmer."
How we’d work together
Better Than This: 1:1 Journey
Six sessions, blending coaching, clinical hypnotherapy and TARC EFT, to understand the pattern running underneath and start interrupting it.
You’ll also leave with tapping, a tool you can use yourself when things feel intense.
£597 online, or £697 in person in Aberdeenshire.
It starts with a free 30-minute Quality of Life Call, so we can see what’s driving it and whether this is the right next step.
Real people. Real change.
Wendy had finished her nursing degree and her children had left home, but she was still asking, “What now? Who am I, for me?”
Much of her life had been spent trying to prove her worth.
Now she can say no and feel strong doing it, and she’s walking her own path. In her words: “I don’t want to live my life watching others. I want to live my life.”
Not ready for a quiz or a call?
Every Monday, I share one honest moment from my week and one thing I noticed. Now and then, I’ll pass on a podcast I’ve found useful. Just hit reply if it rings true.
Success should feel better than this.
Cost should never be the only reason someone doesn't get support. If things are genuinely tight right now, reply to any email or get in touch directly
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